skrivande, böcker, resor. och tre små barn.


Det var bilbälten som skulle spännas och barn som skulle bäras, det var tassande fötter om natten.
Kvällar på akuten när huvudet aldrig hann tänka en onödig tanke, kvällar när jag satt med min tekopp och min kunskap och väntade på sådant som aldrig hände.
Det var fradgan på havsvågorna jag såg under mina kvällspromenader och solnedgångarnas gyllenhet och hur jag längtade efter tid att fånga in allt vackert i sinnet utan att känna att jag var på väg någon annanstans.
Det var mina ord som jag inte längre visste vad jag ville göra något med, det var bokidéerna som jag stoppade undan och långt bort i väntan på andra tider.
Det var att skriva på den här platsen och plötsligt få se den blomma ut till något större än vad jag någonsin förväntat mig.
Det var att springa tills andan inte längre fick plats i halsen och att göra armhävningar på gräsmattan, det var att läsa böcker igen och tänka: det här är också ett sätt att närma sig ord.
Orden måste inte alltid vara ens egna.
Och det var kyssarna i förbifarten, någons hand i ryggslutet, skaldjurspasta på balkongen och chili över allt jag åt och vispgrädde i kaffet en vanlig måndagsmorgon
det var ungar i famnen på ryggen i handen det var kroppsvärme så nära min att jag somnade av välbehag fast det bara var ett barn som skulle läggas,
det var allt som var viktigt i den gråaste vardag, allt som var ljuvligt i den gråaste vardag,
allt som gav den gråaste vardag färg
Och sedan – äntligen! – var det sommarlov.
Liknande inlägg:


Midsommarafton (och alla andra aftnar)


Helsingforshistorier, del 1: Happy place

24 kommentarer

  1. Precis så. Gud vad jag längtar efter sommarlov eller bara en liten paus.

  2. Fint!
    sv: Haha men eller hur! Jag bär ALLTID med mig en väska numera för nästan inga av mina kläder har fickor längre… </3

  3. Jag hör melodin spelas upp till dina ord och jag låter mig bara ta in den, omsluta mig. Som en mjuk acceptans inför livet. Tack!

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