Att begripa sig på det egna livet är som att begripa sig på det egna skrivandet. När man är mitt i det, i det första utkastet, är man blind. För de egna upplevelserna, de egna orden. Visst flödar det på. Men inte vet man om det blir något värdefullt.
Den egna texten behöver få vila för att nå sin fulla potential. Helst så länge att den slutar att vara ens egen text, blir som vilken text som helst. Jag har fortfarande för lite tålamod för att låta det jag skriver vila så länge som det borde. En gång för länge sedan hade jag för lite tålamod för att redigera över huvud taget, men jag har lärt mig att älska det. Redigeringen är processen som tar något acceptabelt till något raffinerat.
Och ju mer jag lär mig efterarbetningen, desto bättre blir också det första utkastet. Som om jag instinktivt lär mig vad redigerings-Ulrika kommer att vilja ha, skriver det så från första början.
*
Jag får inte redigera om livet. Vissa saker måste man spika redan i första utkastet. Men det finns scener i livet som upprepar sig, dramaturgiska kurvor som återkommer, teman som löper genom hela berättelsen. När jag är mitt i det ser jag bara att det flödar, men inte vad värdet är. Senare, när upplevelserna får vila, kan de sluta att vara mina upplevelser. Först när de blir berättelser som hade kunnat handla om någon annan kan jag se dem klart.
*
Jag försöker göra som med mina texter. Låta erfarenheten av allt som inte blivit bra göra nästa version bättre.
Jag tänker på det när allting bara upprepar sig, samma monotona lunk fylld avslagenhet, när jag undrar om hela livet bara är samma misstag som går på repeat.
Att jag inte är samma som jag en gång var. Jag har lärt mig bygga om mina meningar så att de har ett annat flow, jag har lärt mig bygga mina berättelser så att de har ett annat driv, jag har lärt mig att leva mitt liv med andra existensfärdigheter.
*
Alla de första utkasten som inte blev.
De var inte förgäves.
40 Comments
I needed to draft you the very small remark to finally say thanks a lot yet again on your fantastic pointers you have discussed on this page. This has been really incredibly open-handed with people like you to convey extensively all some people could have advertised for an ebook to make some profit for their own end, and in particular seeing that you could have done it in the event you wanted. These suggestions also worked like a good way to fully grasp that other people online have the identical dreams just like mine to find out significantly more when it comes to this condition. I know there are lots of more enjoyable times up front for many who start reading your blog post.
I in addition to my pals were found to be checking out the great helpful hints from your web blog and then all of a sudden I had a terrible feeling I never expressed respect to you for them. Those young men happened to be happy to study them and have in effect truly been loving those things. We appreciate you turning out to be considerably considerate and then for opting for variety of really good subject areas millions of individuals are really desperate to discover. Our honest regret for not expressing appreciation to you earlier.
Needed to post you a bit of observation to be able to give many thanks again with the marvelous pointers you’ve featured on this website. It is really wonderfully open-handed of you to supply freely what numerous people could have distributed for an electronic book to help make some cash for their own end, specifically given that you might well have tried it in the event you decided. The suggestions as well served to be the fantastic way to be sure that the rest have similar passion just like my own to understand whole lot more with reference to this problem. I’m sure there are numerous more pleasant moments in the future for individuals who browse through your blog.
My wife and i were so glad when John managed to finish off his research by way of the ideas he made using your weblog. It’s not at all simplistic just to continually be giving away techniques which often some others could have been making money from. And we acknowledge we now have the writer to appreciate for this. Most of the illustrations you made, the straightforward blog menu, the friendships you can help promote – it’s got many astounding, and it’s really aiding our son and us imagine that this matter is cool, which is certainly highly vital. Many thanks for all!
I truly wanted to write a brief message to express gratitude to you for all of the awesome techniques you are placing at this site. My extended internet research has at the end been compensated with professional ideas to talk about with my close friends. I ’d point out that most of us website visitors are very much fortunate to live in a useful community with very many brilliant professionals with interesting secrets. I feel extremely blessed to have come across the web pages and look forward to really more awesome minutes reading here. Thanks once more for a lot of things.
I discovered your blog site on google and verify a couple of of your early posts. Continue to maintain up the superb operate. I just extra up your RSS feed to my MSN News Reader. In search of ahead to studying more from you afterward!?
Thanks for all of the labor on this website. Betty loves engaging in research and it’s really simple to grasp why. We notice all relating to the powerful mode you provide precious tactics via the web blog and as well as increase participation from website visitors on the idea then my child has always been studying so much. Have fun with the rest of the year. You’re performing a fantastic job.
I really wanted to construct a small note to be able to thank you for all the pleasant techniques you are giving on this website. My extended internet lookup has at the end been honored with pleasant insight to talk about with my pals. I ’d point out that we website visitors actually are very much fortunate to exist in a good place with very many outstanding professionals with valuable things. I feel pretty grateful to have encountered the web pages and look forward to many more fun minutes reading here. Thanks a lot again for everything.
My husband and i ended up being quite satisfied that Michael could do his inquiry via the ideas he had when using the blog. It is now and again perplexing just to continually be giving out facts which many others might have been trying to sell. So we do understand we now have the website owner to give thanks to because of that. The illustrations you made, the simple web site menu, the relationships you make it possible to create – it is mostly astounding, and it’s making our son in addition to the family believe that this concept is cool, and that is unbelievably pressing. Thanks for the whole thing!
I’m also writing to let you know what a useful encounter my friend’s daughter found checking your webblog. She realized such a lot of things, including what it is like to have a wonderful coaching heart to have other folks without difficulty fully grasp chosen grueling subject matter. You really did more than her expectations. Many thanks for displaying such warm and friendly, trustworthy, revealing and as well as cool guidance on that topic to Evelyn.
Thanks a lot for giving everyone a very terrific possiblity to read from here. It’s always very beneficial and also full of a good time for me and my office colleagues to visit your blog more than thrice weekly to read through the newest items you have. And indeed, I’m usually satisfied with all the surprising techniques you serve. Some two ideas in this article are particularly the very best we have ever had.
A lot of thanks for every one of your effort on this web page. Ellie take interest in making time for investigation and it’s really easy to understand why. A number of us notice all concerning the dynamic way you provide valuable steps through your web site and therefore recommend response from other individuals about this idea then our favorite simple princess is actually studying a lot. Take pleasure in the rest of the new year. You’re the one doing a useful job.
I truly wanted to send a remark in order to thank you for those fantastic tips you are showing at this site. My rather long internet search has at the end of the day been paid with good quality points to talk about with my classmates and friends. I would declare that many of us site visitors actually are undoubtedly endowed to exist in a fine place with so many wonderful people with very helpful opinions. I feel really lucky to have used your entire web site and look forward to really more brilliant minutes reading here. Thank you again for a lot of things.
My spouse and i felt quite thankful that Edward managed to finish off his web research while using the ideas he gained in your web pages. It’s not at all simplistic to simply find yourself giving away solutions a number of people could have been trying to sell. And now we already know we have got you to give thanks to because of that. All of the explanations you made, the easy website navigation, the friendships you can help instill – it’s mostly astonishing, and it’s leading our son in addition to us understand this theme is pleasurable, which is rather important. Thanks for the whole thing!
I must show appreciation to you for rescuing me from this instance. As a result of scouting throughout the online world and seeing principles which are not beneficial, I was thinking my entire life was well over. Living devoid of the strategies to the difficulties you’ve resolved by means of the short article is a serious case, as well as those that might have badly affected my entire career if I hadn’t noticed the website. Your actual competence and kindness in controlling every part was precious. I’m not sure what I would have done if I hadn’t discovered such a step like this. I’m able to now look ahead to my future. Thanks a lot very much for this impressive and amazing help. I won’t think twice to suggest your web blog to anybody who requires care about this subject.
I would like to show thanks to the writer for bailing me out of this type of instance. Because of scouting throughout the internet and seeing concepts that were not powerful, I thought my life was done. Living without the approaches to the issues you’ve fixed through this posting is a crucial case, and the ones which might have badly damaged my entire career if I hadn’t come across your web site. Your personal know-how and kindness in playing with all areas was excellent. I don’t know what I would’ve done if I had not come upon such a stuff like this. I’m able to now relish my future. Thank you very much for the high quality and results-oriented guide. I will not hesitate to endorse your blog to any individual who would need tips about this subject matter.
My husband and i ended up being now ecstatic when John managed to complete his survey while using the ideas he received out of your web pages. It’s not at all simplistic to simply be giving for free secrets the others might have been trying to sell. Therefore we fully grasp we have the blog owner to give thanks to for that. The illustrations you made, the straightforward website menu, the relationships you give support to create – it’s got mostly remarkable, and it’s leading our son in addition to our family understand that subject matter is thrilling, and that’s extraordinarily pressing. Many thanks for all the pieces!
I definitely wanted to write down a quick message to be able to appreciate you for all the precious strategies you are sharing on this site. My time-consuming internet lookup has at the end of the day been recognized with brilliant ideas to write about with my friends and classmates. I would suppose that many of us website visitors are definitely fortunate to exist in a notable site with very many wonderful people with good opinions. I feel quite grateful to have used your entire weblog and look forward to many more cool minutes reading here. Thank you once again for all the details.
I and also my pals have already been reading the best key points located on your site then all of a sudden I got a horrible suspicion I had not expressed respect to the web blog owner for those secrets. The guys were definitely so warmed to read them and now have undoubtedly been tapping into those things. Thanks for simply being quite helpful and then for using this form of outstanding subjects most people are really wanting to understand about. Our own honest apologies for not expressing appreciation to sooner.
I want to show thanks to this writer for rescuing me from such a situation. After looking out through the internet and meeting tips that were not powerful, I figured my entire life was well over. Living devoid of the approaches to the difficulties you’ve sorted out by way of the posting is a crucial case, and the ones which could have negatively damaged my career if I hadn’t come across your web blog. The understanding and kindness in controlling all the things was useful. I am not sure what I would have done if I had not discovered such a solution like this. I can at this time look forward to my future. Thank you so much for this specialized and amazing guide. I will not be reluctant to propose the blog to any person who would need assistance on this subject matter.
I enjoy you because of your entire labor on this blog. Ellie take interest in doing internet research and it is simple to grasp why. Most people know all regarding the powerful way you make insightful suggestions through the website and as well boost contribution from other individuals on the situation while my daughter is always starting to learn a whole lot. Take advantage of the rest of the new year. You are always conducting a stunning job.
I must show my appreciation to the writer just for bailing me out of this matter. After surfing around throughout the the net and finding methods that were not powerful, I figured my life was gone. Existing minus the solutions to the issues you’ve solved by means of your entire article content is a serious case, and ones that might have in a negative way damaged my career if I had not noticed your web site. Your primary natural talent and kindness in playing with every part was valuable. I am not sure what I would’ve done if I hadn’t encountered such a thing like this. I can also at this moment look ahead to my future. Thank you very much for the specialized and effective guide. I will not think twice to endorse your blog to any individual who requires assistance about this matter.
I must show my appreciation to you just for bailing me out of this type of setting. Just after exploring through the world-wide-web and obtaining tricks that were not helpful, I thought my entire life was done. Being alive without the presence of answers to the issues you have resolved all through your entire posting is a crucial case, and those that could have negatively affected my entire career if I hadn’t discovered your website. Your actual competence and kindness in touching every item was helpful. I am not sure what I would’ve done if I hadn’t encountered such a thing like this. I can also at this time look ahead to my future. Thank you very much for this expert and results-oriented help. I won’t hesitate to suggest the blog to anybody who needs to have guidelines on this matter.
I together with my pals were found to be looking at the nice tips and tricks on your web site while suddenly I got a horrible suspicion I had not expressed respect to the website owner for those tips. All the guys were definitely stimulated to read through them and have in effect actually been tapping into those things. I appreciate you for actually being indeed thoughtful and then for considering such exceptional topics most people are really eager to be aware of. Our sincere apologies for not saying thanks to you earlier.
I actually wanted to compose a remark to be able to appreciate you for all the marvelous suggestions you are writing here. My time-consuming internet investigation has finally been recognized with extremely good details to talk about with my pals. I would mention that we readers actually are very blessed to be in a great network with many outstanding people with helpful ideas. I feel quite privileged to have seen your web page and look forward to tons of more fabulous minutes reading here. Thanks a lot again for all the details.
I would like to point out my love for your generosity supporting those individuals that must have help on your theme. Your real dedication to passing the message up and down has been definitely practical and have in most cases allowed somebody just like me to attain their objectives. Your personal invaluable guidelines entails this much to me and extremely more to my mates. Regards; from each one of us.
My spouse and i were very happy when Emmanuel managed to deal with his web research through your precious recommendations he made when using the blog. It is now and again perplexing to just possibly be giving for free guidance that many many people may have been trying to sell. We really fully understand we have got the writer to appreciate because of that. All of the explanations you’ve made, the straightforward website navigation, the friendships you will help to engender – it’s all incredible, and it is facilitating our son and us know that the article is exciting, which is particularly indispensable. Thanks for the whole lot!
I and my guys have been checking out the good information found on your web site and quickly got a horrible suspicion I never expressed respect to the site owner for those techniques. All the young boys are actually for this reason warmed to read them and have now clearly been taking pleasure in these things. Appreciate your actually being well thoughtful and also for picking this kind of cool areas millions of individuals are really desirous to be informed on. Our own honest apologies for not expressing gratitude to you sooner.
I wish to convey my passion for your generosity giving support to persons that actually need help with this particular matter. Your special dedication to passing the message all around was exceptionally functional and have usually permitted many people much like me to achieve their endeavors. Your valuable publication entails a great deal a person like me and much more to my fellow workers. With thanks; from everyone of us.
I precisely desired to appreciate you again. I am not sure the things I would’ve gone through in the absence of the actual ways revealed by you relating to such subject matter. It had become the frightful situation in my opinion, but discovering your expert manner you treated the issue made me to jump over joy. I’m thankful for this advice and even sincerely hope you comprehend what a powerful job you are always putting in educating the mediocre ones all through a site. I know that you haven’t got to know all of us.
I simply wished to appreciate you all over again. I’m not certain the things that I could possibly have gone through without the strategies revealed by you directly on such industry. This was a real depressing concern for me, nevertheless taking a look at your specialised technique you dealt with that made me to jump with contentment. I’m just happy for your guidance and as well , have high hopes you recognize what a powerful job you have been providing teaching many people with the aid of your web page. I’m certain you’ve never come across all of us.
I actually wanted to type a quick message in order to say thanks to you for all of the nice tips you are posting on this website. My particularly long internet investigation has finally been compensated with high-quality know-how to share with my co-workers. I ’d admit that most of us website visitors actually are unequivocally lucky to exist in a fine network with many wonderful people with good tricks. I feel rather grateful to have discovered the website page and look forward to so many more cool moments reading here. Thanks a lot once more for everything.
I am just writing to make you understand of the remarkable encounter my cousin’s princess enjoyed studying your web site. She picked up a good number of details, including what it’s like to have an incredible helping heart to make most people really easily completely grasp some complicated issues. You undoubtedly exceeded my expectations. Many thanks for rendering those useful, dependable, explanatory and as well as cool guidance on this topic to Ethel.
I truly wanted to make a small remark to be able to thank you for the amazing ways you are giving on this site. My time-consuming internet investigation has finally been recognized with pleasant facts to share with my companions. I ’d point out that many of us readers are unequivocally endowed to live in a useful community with so many perfect individuals with helpful tactics. I feel somewhat happy to have seen your entire web page and look forward to some more cool times reading here. Thank you once again for everything.
Thank you so much for giving everyone remarkably nice chance to read critical reviews from this web site. It is often very kind and as well , full of a great time for me and my office fellow workers to search your website at a minimum 3 times in a week to find out the fresh secrets you have got. And lastly, I am actually fulfilled with all the unbelievable thoughts you serve. Certain 4 tips in this post are undeniably the most impressive we have all had.
I needed to post you this little bit of word to say thanks the moment again relating to the spectacular secrets you’ve documented on this page. It has been quite strangely generous of people like you to convey openly all many people would have distributed as an e book to help with making some bucks for their own end, even more so seeing that you could have done it in the event you desired. The techniques additionally worked to become easy way to recognize that other individuals have the same dreams just like my personal own to realize a good deal more regarding this problem. I believe there are a lot more enjoyable opportunities in the future for people who read your website.
lmfwlhmpsk,If you have any struggle to download KineMaster for PC just visit this site.
I truly wanted to type a brief comment in order to express gratitude to you for some of the pleasant points you are placing on this website. My long internet search has at the end been recognized with professional ideas to write about with my friends and family. I ’d express that most of us site visitors actually are rather blessed to be in a fine community with so many outstanding professionals with interesting tricks. I feel truly grateful to have used the web pages and look forward to tons of more cool moments reading here. Thank you again for a lot of things.
I simply wanted to appreciate you yet again. I do not know the things that I could possibly have worked on in the absence of the type of suggestions revealed by you directly on this area. It was the troublesome case in my circumstances, however , looking at a specialised fashion you dealt with the issue took me to cry for happiness. I am happier for your assistance and thus sincerely hope you really know what a great job that you’re providing training men and women with the aid of your website. I know that you have never got to know any of us.
My wife and i got absolutely peaceful Louis could round up his basic research with the ideas he gained through the site. It’s not at all simplistic to simply be freely giving guidance that many people today may have been making money from. And we all acknowledge we need the blog owner to give thanks to because of that. The main illustrations you’ve made, the easy website navigation, the friendships you can give support to instill – it is all powerful, and it’s assisting our son and us believe that the theme is brilliant, which is wonderfully mandatory. Thank you for all the pieces!